May Allah ease my PhD journey...Amin.
Now it is time to sprint!!
You can do it Hida!
Yes you cannnn!!
Sunday, August 27, 2017
Thursday, August 24, 2017
Until when?
Alhamdulillah. Lepas hampir 10 bulan arwah yan takde, mungkin hati ni dah kuat sikit. Tak menangis setiap hari dah. Walaupun ada jugak hari yang rindu teramat amat kat arwah yan.
Tapi,
Bila hati ni terlebih gembira pada hari tertentu, at last mesti akan sedih. Sebab rasa kehilangan ni amat besar sampai tak boleh nak rasa bahagia. Contoh hari ni, main kat water themepark seharian dengan labmates, I'm so happy but in the end, masa nak tidur ni, teringat semua kegembiraan dengan arwah yan buatkan hati ni sedih sangat. Sangat. Everytime rasa happy mesti akan teringat arwah yan.
Dulu klau family ktorg pergi water theme park, klau pelampung yang dua orang naik tu, mesti along akan naik dengan adik na. Aku mesti dengan arwah yan. Rindu nya Ya Allah.
Ok dah tak mampu nak taip lagi.
Crying.
Tapi,
Bila hati ni terlebih gembira pada hari tertentu, at last mesti akan sedih. Sebab rasa kehilangan ni amat besar sampai tak boleh nak rasa bahagia. Contoh hari ni, main kat water themepark seharian dengan labmates, I'm so happy but in the end, masa nak tidur ni, teringat semua kegembiraan dengan arwah yan buatkan hati ni sedih sangat. Sangat. Everytime rasa happy mesti akan teringat arwah yan.
Dulu klau family ktorg pergi water theme park, klau pelampung yang dua orang naik tu, mesti along akan naik dengan adik na. Aku mesti dengan arwah yan. Rindu nya Ya Allah.
Ok dah tak mampu nak taip lagi.
Crying.
Tuesday, July 4, 2017
Selamat hari raya.
First raya that was completely different.
I once thought that my raya will be different after my brother, Along married. I imagined that our siblings wont be completed anymore because Along have to raya at the his in law's house. But I do thought that it still fine because I still having arwah Yan with me. I'm closer with Along and arwah Yan rather than my sister. I don't why but maybe I spent more time with them. In the back time, I always follow both of them took wedding photos everywhere and during waiting my master's viva, I spent almost 3 months helping them printing the T-shirts. Every day we waking up, eating, and sleeping at the same time at the same house. That is where our siblings relationship bonding. And just to tell you, after my brother married, I get closer and closer to arwah Yan. Because I only have him with me. To accompany me to wherever I wanna go..hehe. As I already enter UPM to pursue my study and arwah Yan at KLMU but still staying with Along at Mantin, every weekend, if we got free time either we going back to hometown or hanging out together. Sometimes with Along and Kak siti and sometimes only both of us. This time my sister was studying away from us. So thats the reason I didn't talk much about her.
Oh no, I should talking about raya. Sorry!
I'm so grateful that our raya 2016 my brother decided to raya at our house first because I'm not ready yet to witness missing family member on the first day raya. I'm even more
grateful now because if not, two years in row our raya family potrait got missing member. Well, at least I can keep the 2016 raya memories forever.
And now,
Raya 2017,
I'm actually missing both of my wings. Both Along and arwah Yan TIADA. Along at his in law's hometown and arwah Yan with Him. I forget that 'manusia hanya merancang, Allah yang menentukannya'. I accept this is a test from Him for me. Learn to let go, learn to remember Him even more. Alhamdullilah, I still have mak, ayah and adik Na in this raya. Alhamdullillah. Thank you Allah for still giving me time to be with them.
Well, my sister only arrived at our hometown at 1.30 am before raya. Which means that only me doing all the works. Yes, I'm all alone. It was sooo exhausted! Never in my raya I am that tired. First day raya, after went to atuk, wan, makngah house, for the first time I sleep back for hours. Just woke up with the handphone's sounds when whatsapp group from 'Konvo Combo' start to pop out nak ajak beraya. Hahaha. What a name. I still laughing at the group name. I supposed to mute all the whatsapp groups except fews groups including konvo combo. Why this group kinds of special to me because they all I have rather than other so called friends at my hometown.
Eh, I'm so sorry for off topic again.
😆
Maybe it's the sign that I should writing for now. Okay that's my raya 2017 story.
Selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin.
P/s: I'm in mood to write in english, so pardon my grammar! My bad 😊
I once thought that my raya will be different after my brother, Along married. I imagined that our siblings wont be completed anymore because Along have to raya at the his in law's house. But I do thought that it still fine because I still having arwah Yan with me. I'm closer with Along and arwah Yan rather than my sister. I don't why but maybe I spent more time with them. In the back time, I always follow both of them took wedding photos everywhere and during waiting my master's viva, I spent almost 3 months helping them printing the T-shirts. Every day we waking up, eating, and sleeping at the same time at the same house. That is where our siblings relationship bonding. And just to tell you, after my brother married, I get closer and closer to arwah Yan. Because I only have him with me. To accompany me to wherever I wanna go..hehe. As I already enter UPM to pursue my study and arwah Yan at KLMU but still staying with Along at Mantin, every weekend, if we got free time either we going back to hometown or hanging out together. Sometimes with Along and Kak siti and sometimes only both of us. This time my sister was studying away from us. So thats the reason I didn't talk much about her.
Oh no, I should talking about raya. Sorry!
I'm so grateful that our raya 2016 my brother decided to raya at our house first because I'm not ready yet to witness missing family member on the first day raya. I'm even more
grateful now because if not, two years in row our raya family potrait got missing member. Well, at least I can keep the 2016 raya memories forever.
And now,
Raya 2017,
I'm actually missing both of my wings. Both Along and arwah Yan TIADA. Along at his in law's hometown and arwah Yan with Him. I forget that 'manusia hanya merancang, Allah yang menentukannya'. I accept this is a test from Him for me. Learn to let go, learn to remember Him even more. Alhamdullilah, I still have mak, ayah and adik Na in this raya. Alhamdullillah. Thank you Allah for still giving me time to be with them.
Well, my sister only arrived at our hometown at 1.30 am before raya. Which means that only me doing all the works. Yes, I'm all alone. It was sooo exhausted! Never in my raya I am that tired. First day raya, after went to atuk, wan, makngah house, for the first time I sleep back for hours. Just woke up with the handphone's sounds when whatsapp group from 'Konvo Combo' start to pop out nak ajak beraya. Hahaha. What a name. I still laughing at the group name. I supposed to mute all the whatsapp groups except fews groups including konvo combo. Why this group kinds of special to me because they all I have rather than other so called friends at my hometown.
Eh, I'm so sorry for off topic again.
😆
Maybe it's the sign that I should writing for now. Okay that's my raya 2017 story.
Selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin.
P/s: I'm in mood to write in english, so pardon my grammar! My bad 😊
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